Tractors for Prime Ministers...

aka, The New Europe

Watched the brilliant Dylan Moran on telly last night.
For those not in the know, think a darker, more morose, more surreal, Irish editon of Billy Connolly, without the slap-happiness. Yes, I'm one of the three people in the UK that doesn't rate Connolly...

Now, Moran, ah, there's an altogether different kettle of fish: this is the genre done right.
In a glorious, unrelenting Joycian epiphany, totally in accord with the venue of Baile Atha Cliath (Dublin, to you Wily Oriental Gentlemen), he charmed the audience with an hour of smoky, not altogether untipsy, blarney. Real connoisieurs claimed to see somewhat of a successor to Dave Allen, too. So that tradition is far from lost.

He didn't do much politics, mainly personal - or just plain goofy - stuff, but he did do a great little cameo on the "New Europe", which I'll do my best to transcribe here. With all the talk around at the moment, what with the Constitution voting and what have you, it's good to be reminded of the good ole basics...

The Americans, in turn, respond with a fairly anti-European sentiment, particularly against the French.

Donald Rumsfeld, who is one of the faces of their - you know - administration, said that he was not interested in dealing with Old Europe, he wanted to deal with New Europe. What he meant by that, was that Old Europe was France and Germany, who voted against him in the war.

So he didn't want to deal with Old Europe, two ancient civilizations, but New Europe. And new Europe is places like Scrovovia, Vivonia, Chigovia and Lvovia, places where tractors are Ministers, and people sit down to a meal of boiled radiators.

Places that aren't that swish, really, and who are going to do whatever America says because they hope one day they are going to get to see a photo of a pot of jam...

I think it's available on DVD (it wasn't live), and I think the pic above is its cover, not 1000% sure though, I'll verify and get back to you, but if you can get hold of it, go on, treat yourself!!

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I must also say, that viewing the Eurovision context the next evening, and wondering what earthly logic there could possibly be behind the win of the appalling Greek entry, it occurred to me that the greater part of the sum total of the Greek votes came from the former Eastern block countries, which makes sense, because this is exactly the sort of music you would enjoy if you've just spent 50 years with a tractor for Prime Minister.

Those of you who are Greek will already have read pitsiriko's two impecable analyses of the night's proceedings.